All Boys, All Blogged: April 21, 2015

Focus: How can make our essays stylistically strong?

1.  Enjoying a brief mini lesson on verbs with Ms. Leclaire:

Look through your essay for this verb construction: is/are/were/was ___________-ing

Examples:

Truman is trying...
Montag is thinking...
Christof and his crew were deceiving...

Try to eliminate the "to be" verb and the "ing."

Fixed Examples:

Truman tries
Montag thinks
Christof deceived

Try fixing this one: 
She is trying to change Truman's mind, reassuring him that everything is fine. But she is also frustrating Truman, who wants only to escape.


Look through your essay and make sure all verbs are in the present tense.

Example:
Montag started his heroic journey when he killed Beatty.

Fixed Example:
Montag starts his heroic journey when he kills Beatty.

Example:
Truman had disregarded the fallen light in the opening scene, but he later saw its significance.

Fixed Example:
Truman has disregarded the fallen light in the opening scene, but he later sees its significance.

2. Giving your essays a final, thorough edit with the slides linked here 

3. Peer editing with the official rubric

HW:
1. Please revise your essays based on today's editing lessons.

2. If you do not turn in your parents' signatures for the book-film clubs proposals by Friday, you will be reading a district-approved book selected by Ms. Leclaire.

3. You need a physical copy of your book by this Friday.

4. Final, final drafts of your essays due this Friday. Feel free to e-mail me or stop in for a conference if you need some advice.

5. If you have not yet presented your banned book speech, you will do so this Friday.